Becoming a Mami has made me realize that perfection is not only impossible, it’s overrated and bound to lead to disappointment. Life is messy and so am I. I own my imperfections and embrace them as part of my charm. I hereby give myself permission to be flawed without feeling like a failure. Does that make me a Scary Mami? Absolutely! I may be a Scary Mami, but I’m doing my best and gosh darn it, that’s good enough.
How do I know that I am a Scary Mami? Let me count the ways. For your edification, I present : The Top 10 Reasons I Know that I am a Scary Mami.
#10. If you ask me when the last time I took a shower was, I might not know.
#9. Yeah, yeah, baby wipes are for baby’s bum, but more importantly they are for Mami’s armpits, and feet, and…(you don’t want to know).
#8. I own ear plugs and I’m not afraid to use them.
#7. Why would I wash my hair when I can just pull it back into a messy bun?
#6. My version of homemade baby food is refried beans and hot sauce because that’s what I happen to be eating. Guess what? Baby likey.
#5. I bring my laptop into the bathroom when I give my daughter a bath. Hey, Mami’s got to get her blog on!
#4. When I first started giving my daughter regular milk, I accidentally bought non-fat and couldn’t figure out why she was hungry all day. She kept drinking it like it was water (it pretty much was).
#3. Sometimes when my daughter falls asleep in the car, I use it as an excuse to buy fast food. Normally, I’m a total snob that looks down on fast food, but what am I supposed to do? I’m hungry and I don’t want to wake the baby. It’s a sacrifice I’m willing to make because that’s the kind of Mami I am.
#2. I’ve left the house with a big shmear of baby poop on my pants and when I realized it, I just shrugged my shoulders and thought: Oh well, I’ll just pretend it’s mustard.
and the #1 reason I know that I am a Scary Mami:
Today, when I was about to take a much needed nap my husband started yelling for me to come into the living room because our daughter was taking her first steps and I actually considered pretending that I didn’t hear. It’s not like she won’t take other steps. Don’t worry I got my raggedy butt out of bed and witnesses the miracle, but I wasn’t happy about the timing.Don’t judge me; I’m tired.
So what about you? Are you a Scary Mommy or Daddy? Were you raised by a Scary Mommy?
If you’d like to read about more Scary Mommies go check out Scary Mommy she’s hosting a contest for Scary Mommies in honor of the new movie Motherhood.
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