I am trying to find a cute and witty way to write about this, but it’s not coming so I’m just gonna be straightforward.
We have two daughters. Two beautiful, challenging, engaging, wonderful, and exhausting daughters. We love our daughters, we are thrilled to have them. We are in no way disappointed.
Why am I announcing this? Because I can’t tell you how many people seem to assume that when we had our second daughter, what we really wanted was a boy. They give us a little shrug as if to say, “oh well.” Some even go so far as to ask, “Are you going to keep trying for a boy?”
I’m not knocking boys. I love boys. In all honesty, before we had our first daughter I was kinda sorta hoping for a boy. Not because I think boys are better, but because I was afraid to have a girl. I was once a girl-child and my childhood was not easy. How could I possibly want a girl when I know how difficult life can be for a girl, a girl like me at least? I thought that if I had a boy-child things might be easier for him.
Well, we had a girl and I fell in love and out of fear. My childhood is not her childhood. She does not have to suffer the way I did or doubt or feel constrained.
When we decided to have a second child, we both wanted another girl. A boy would have been fine, we would have loved that boy just as much, but when we would lay in bed at night talking we would admit that we’d rather have a girl.
Everyone seemed to think our second would be a boy. Even we thought we would have a boy. The baby was crafty and kept hiding its naughty bits whenever we had an ultrasound, but soon enough we found out we were having another girl. And we were thrilled!
As terrified as I was of having a daughter the first time around, I am now aware that having two girls is perfect for us. My fears were based on my childhood, but my daughters are not me. I am so excited to have the opportunity to raise two girls because I believe in them so much. I believe in their strength and intelligence. I believe in their worth. I believe that they will grow up to be amazing women.
So never assume that a parent with two girls (or two boys), really wanted one of each because WE ARE NOT DISAPPOINTED.
San Francisco, CA.
